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Josie Pickens sounds off on recent dating trends pointing to Black women coming together with Asian men by Josie Pickens, November 12, Comments Interracial dating and marriage are more popular today than they have ever been. According to various studies, millennials certainly see race much differently than every previous generation in the US. Nine out of 10 of them would be fine with people in their circles dating someone outside their race or ethnicity. And although a Black woman was at the center of the Supreme Court case that legalized interracial marriage between Blacks and Whites in America, Black women seem to be not only less likely to marry non-Black men, but less likely to marry at all. Most of the conversations I have with Black women about dating and relationships include a deeper conversation about how, maybe, Black women need to engage in more interracial dating. Years ago, I read that Asian men are also less likely to marry non-Asian women, and are also less likely to be married overall. In an article titled The Unmarriables:

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Samuel Goodman Sam is just a regular, normal man who humbly requests: Please don’t shoot the messenger. One interesting effect of the obesity epidemic has been an increase in the desirability of Asian women. Thirty years ago, nailing an Asian chick was a consolation prize for a white guy who struck out with his own kind.

Sociologists talk about all sorts of possible explanations: All these explanations are probably wrong.

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Admittedly, the dating game is not equal and it is not kind. Dating site OK Cupid has carved out a nice little sideline in blogging about the statistics of their more successful users , to try to help people along the way, busting myths about what does and does constitute a good profile photo and whether eating oatmeal correlates with people you’ll like or drinking beer correlates with sex on the first date. But noting trends is not the same as endorsing them – and some trends are simply disturbing.

The sheer number of cack-handed replies women of Asian ancestry get on dating sites has even spawned its own dedicated tumblr, Creepy White Guys. Hilarious if you are simply an outside observer, and probably pretty depressing if you’re someone getting these messages. It seems the objectification is hardly limited to dating websites, though, as comedy videos like “What kind of Asian are you? It goes the other way as well, with women of all races preferring white men, apart from black women who prefer black men.

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Hi Christelyn, I hope this message finds you well. My name is Tim and I recently saw a Youtube video you had posted wherein you interviewed Asian men and Black American women in NYC about their thoughts regarding interracial dating and marriage. From there I found your other video to which I am responding. First, I would just like to commend you for the outstanding work you have done and thank you for navigating these issues of race in the way that you do.

Before I get to the heart of my response, perhaps I should preface it with a little information about myself. My dad is of mixed European ancestry and self-identifies as White, and my mom is half Puerto Rican and half Italian and identifies as multi-racial however, she acknowledges that she can oftentimes pass for White and as such does benefit from White privilege. I grew up in a predominantly White area and was one of the only Asian American students for the entirety of my grammar and high school career.

During and after college, I have maintained a diverse group of friends and have had the good fortune to travel to various places in Asia including a two year stint in Korea and Taiwan, as well as less extensive periods in Hong Kong, Japan, and mainland China. Moreover, I have dated both intra- and inter-racially with Black women among others and was most recently in a 3 year relationship with a Black American woman who self-identified as such.

In short, the main thing that I wanted to say is that there is no reason for Black women to hesitate dating Asian men any more than they would anyone else. Rather than abide by the commonly held belief that conflict may stem from actual differences in culture between members of the respective groups , she instead illustrates how some Koreans are actually influenced by the US mass media to view Black Americans negatively prior to their arrival in this country.

I use this example not because I am trying to argue that Koreans or other Asians are in no way prejudiced all by themselves and that those biased ways of seeing things may impede an otherwise decent romantic relationship; rather, I am merely trying to illustrate a degree of complexity to this issue which I feel is oftentimes overlooked. Although it can seem tempting to write Asian men off because they or their families may have racist notions about Black Americans, when we broaden our purview we see that the issue stretches far beyond that of the Asian American community.

It is a problem of mass media representation, global cultural and information flows, and a lack of autonomy for people of color including Asians to choose how they are portrayed and for and by whom.

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We are a member of the Online Dating Association ODA which was set up to ensure high standards of behaviour by dating service providers serving the UK. As an ODA Member we are required to have appropriate and effective arrangements in place for dealing with complaints and enquiries. The ODA provides general information on common enquiries users have about dating services but will not deal directly with individual complaints which are properly the responsibility of member companies.

The ODA monitors enquiry and complaint levels and the issues complained about. It can intervene if it sees worrying trends or serious matters of concern.

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Some are completely outlandish and some are, well, a little more spot on. Multiple articles and studies discuss how cultural stereotypes of Asian men may make them less attractive to women of all races, including Asians. According to the U. This frustration is not being taken lightly. On another website, one Asian male expresses:

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